Jackpot

A man walks into a bar, and behind the bar he sees a huge pegboard with hundreds of 100 dollar bills attached to it. He walks up to the bartender and says, "Gee, that must be a helluva lot of money. Why is it there?"

"Well, that's our jackpot," the bartender replies. "But so far nobody has managed to win it."

"What do I have to do?"

"Well, first you have to pay 100 bucks. Then you have to brave three challenges."

"And what might they be?"

"Okay, see that seven-foot muscle man at the door? First you have to knock him out. Then go behind the building. There you'll find a pit bull terrier with a bad tooth. Pull out the tooth! Then come back and go upstairs. First door on the left. There's a 350-pound woman in there. She's very old and very ugly. Fuck her and you win the jackpot."

"Okay, I'll give it a shot," says the man.

So he walks over to the muscle man at the front door and says, "Hey, since when did you guys start showing porno flicks on the ceiling?" The muscle man looks up, and the man beans him with a beer bottle. Knocks him out.

"Not bad, the bartender says. And now the dog."

The man walks out the door. All of a sudden there's barking, shouts, garbage countainers cracking. Twenty minutes later the man comes back, covered all over with blood, his shirt ragged, his pants down.

"Alright, now where is this woman with the bad tooth?"